As school closes and kids go home, I finally have some time to reflect on this term and I have to admit, it was not my favorite. I found myself encountering more challenges and frustrations then when I first started. Most volunteers find their first term the worse and then find it getting better. However, my site had to do things backwards. I had an amazing first term. The teachers were supportive, the students and I were getting along, and I was loving teaching. But the minute 2nd term started things started to change. I witnessed a teacher beating a student( to this day I still don’t know why) while the other teachers were sitting around actually encouraging the teacher to beat the child harder. I had witnessed teachers beating students before but this was the first time when the teachers almost seemed animalistic. They seemed to find enjoyment, a sense of power when they beat the student and that I couldn’t handle. As I sat there, trying not to cry, I felt my support system I had come to rely upon disintegrate. For two weeks after the incident, I cried myself to sleep. I couldn’t interact with the teachers the same way. I even started thinking of a site change. But Peace Corps is all about resiliency and if I had changed, I would be back at square one, so after a few more days of being depressed and feeling alone, I came out of the funk and decided to change my surroundings. I was here for the students not to get pulled into the teacher drama. For those who work in a school, you’ll be happy to here that gossip, back stabbing and petty issues are not just found in America. Yes, the teachers I was close with were no longer the right teachers for me to follow, but there was a whole school of teachers who loved me and were ready to help. So I created a new support group, allowing myself to be more open to the other teachers. I also made a promise to myself that I would be more honest with the teachers. If there was something I didn’t like, I would tell the truth instead of keeping my mouth shut in fear of how it would be interpreted. Over time, my mood got back to normal. Soon it came time for final exams, a time I usually dread. This is where the truth comes out about my teaching capabilities. I gave out an HIV exam as well as a KSL. The HIV exam was more for my benefit, unlike KSL. Which in 3 months time, my students would be taking the national exam which would decide if they would go on to secondary school or not…so no pressure or anything. I was nervous but tried to remember these exams will tell me what to work on for next term. HIV test result: out of 45 students, three students got a score above 60 and one of them got an 84( last term only 2 students got a score about 60). KSL test results. Out of 15 students, 6 students got a score above 80. I was proud beyond belief. It really helped that the students who have low self esteem were among the few who got a good score. One of them even placed 3rd in her class. So in terms of relationships with the teachers, this was not a good term. However, when I ignore that and focus on the students, I guess this wasn’t such a bad term after all. Just writing this makes me excited for next term. I can’t wait to make it better.
SIDE NOTE.If any of you have been following the news in Kenya, you will know next week on the 4th is elections for the constitution. People are a little nervous particularly because of past experiences when it comes to elections in this country. But I just wanted people to know that Peace Corps has learned from the past and although they don’t expect it to be as bad as 2007, they are being proactive. I will be in Nairobi for this week. I have been talking to my village and they say they are seeing people learn from their mistakes and are hoping people keep their cool. So by the 10th, I expect to be back in Litein. But non the less, I don’t want to leave so whatever you do, pray, hope, wish, send good thoughts that Kenya will get through its first peaceful election and I will be able to see my students again. I have attached a link to the local paper here in Kenya if you would like to follow whats happening. I will also hopefully have free internet in Nairobi so if anyone wants a chat date, give me a shout. I might be able to even pull a video chat.
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