If you hadn’t noticed from facebook and the blog, the month of October has been HELL! This has probably been the worst month so far. Im hoping for a new one soon. So here are some of my monthly lows and highs. I want to get them all out so when November rolls around, I can start fresh.
HIGH - This month I went to Mumias for a language immersion. I spent 4 days learning Swahili. Hopefully by the time I COS I’ll be at survival skill level.
LOW - Upon arriving home from said immersion I discover my water pipe has burst, theres no money for the event I am planning, Im getting sick and no teacher came into my class to help teach the students(and yet all the teachers expect me to make miracles happen and make the students pass KSL in the KCPE
HIGH(I finally got to talk back to her) LOW( I still have to work with her) - I had a run in with an infamous teacher. She has been acting like a child and so I called her a child and told her to grow up.
HIGH( It made me laugh) LOW( It creeped me out)The climax of the week was a fellow teacher proposing I start a sexual relationship with him to relieve my frustrations. I laughed and said no
HIGH - I decided after that I would head to a friends site for a short escape. It was fun visiting volunteers I hadn’t really thought of visiting.
HIGH ( I have another friend) LOW( shes so young, shes having accidents in my house) - While visiting said friends site, I got talked into taking a puppy home( it didn‘t take that much talking). Not just any puppy, a girl and the runt of the liter. Fearing her immediate execution, I decided to take her home. Im trying to stick to my decision about fattening her up and then giving her to a friend.
HIGH - I started my KSL class at the local VCT on tuedays. We had a lot of fun and I am looking forward to continuing it.
LOW - My headmaster/teachers are already eyeing the result of the KCPE to find out if I am a good teacher or not. When I tried to defend myself, saying I was doing the best I could and its up to the kids, they laughed and said no the test will tell.
HIGH - Im thinking about cutting back on my teaching next year and increasing my activities in the community.
HIGH(I found it) LOW( I can't use it) - I found a $50 bill in a Kenyan mall and I was surprised becasue I wasn't even excited about it.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
The Power of the Stamp
“ The immigration official stamped our passports. I was pleased to see that it was a modest little stamp, unlike most developing countries, which seemed to have decided that if they couldn’t be Great Powers, they could at least have Great Stamps, ornate displays of grandeur occupying a full passport page, sometimes two.” passage from The Sex Lives of Cannibals
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Since my time here in Kenya, I have not met a Kenyan who does NOT like stamping….
The other day, a fellow teacher had a baby and we got him and his family a card as a sign of congratulations. I sat in the staff room ready to sign it. The headmaster was given first dibbs and what does he do? He pulls out a stamp, stamps it, initials it and then puts it in the envelope. I asked why no one was signing it and how does the person receiving it know who it was from? The teachers laughed at me and said the stamp shows its from everyone. They asked me did we do the same in the states. I said yeah from your dentist but not from your coworkers.
Going to the post office is always an ordeal. Not because of the lines, not because of the excruciatingly long time they make you wait as they go to the back stop to story with their coworkers and THEN start to look for your parcel, but because after all that, you still have to stand their as they stamp 5 pages of papers, your parcel, your receipt and anything else they feel like stamping.
I had a list from some of the teachers to take to the local supermarket, after purchasing the items, the clerk took the paper and pulled out a stamp. I looked at him like he was joking and said “ you really don’t have to stamp it, Im just going to throw it away anyway” He looked confused and almost sad he wasn’t able to stamp something. Feeling like I just ruined his day, I gave in and told him to go ahead if it would make him happy. He smiled and proceeded to stamp the hell out of the paper.
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Since my time here in Kenya, I have not met a Kenyan who does NOT like stamping….
The other day, a fellow teacher had a baby and we got him and his family a card as a sign of congratulations. I sat in the staff room ready to sign it. The headmaster was given first dibbs and what does he do? He pulls out a stamp, stamps it, initials it and then puts it in the envelope. I asked why no one was signing it and how does the person receiving it know who it was from? The teachers laughed at me and said the stamp shows its from everyone. They asked me did we do the same in the states. I said yeah from your dentist but not from your coworkers.
Going to the post office is always an ordeal. Not because of the lines, not because of the excruciatingly long time they make you wait as they go to the back stop to story with their coworkers and THEN start to look for your parcel, but because after all that, you still have to stand their as they stamp 5 pages of papers, your parcel, your receipt and anything else they feel like stamping.
I had a list from some of the teachers to take to the local supermarket, after purchasing the items, the clerk took the paper and pulled out a stamp. I looked at him like he was joking and said “ you really don’t have to stamp it, Im just going to throw it away anyway” He looked confused and almost sad he wasn’t able to stamp something. Feeling like I just ruined his day, I gave in and told him to go ahead if it would make him happy. He smiled and proceeded to stamp the hell out of the paper.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
temper tantrums
Most people spend their holidays relaxing, getting chores done around the house or catching up on reading. But what do I do with my holiday? Get on my students must hate list. I was teacher on duty this week and since last time the students and I worked out the kinks, I felt like it would be smooth sailing. Last night I noticed the grounds of the school were covered with trash so I asked primary and vocational students to help me clean up the trash the next day at 11am. Everyone agreed. The next morning I go up at 11 and had to interrupt a football(soccer) game with the vocational boys. I apologized and said as soon as we are finished, you can go back to the game. Well things started going south after that. Primary children were already starting to work….but where were the vocational boys? Hiding in their dorms. I went to them and told them I would keep their football if they didn’t come out and help. I had to literally go back and forth trying to get the vocational students to actually work. By the time we were finished, the vocational boys had been able to skip everything. I watched the students mill into the dinning hall ready to watch tv. I was going to let it go and then I noticed the same boys who were hiding come in and kick some of the primary kids out of their seats. Lets just say my top blew. I got the keys, turned off the tv and then locked the tv cupboard. I explained why I was locking the TV and went into the kitchen to help the cook. A little while later, I noticed sound coming from the dinning hall…..it sounded a lot like tv. I went to leave the kitchen only to find us locked inside. I was pissed! I calmly asked a student to let us out and then went to the tv. Those cheeky little shits broke the lock off the tv box. So I locked it again and this time I locked the dinning hall. I stayed with some, talking to them explaining why I did what I did. It seemed like we were on the same page. So I told them I would go bath and finish up my house chores and then come back. I wasn’t in my house for 5 minutes when I looked outside. And guess what? Those little shits had broken the lock on the dinning hall door and then proceeded to break the lock on the tv cupboard AGAIN! I was furious. These vocational boys, who wanted to be considered men, were acting like spoiled children. Throwing temper tantrums and breaking locks off of things. Well, I had had enough. I was not going to site around babysitting them like little 2yr olds. So, I did what my mother would do….I took their tv. It’s now sitting in my guest room.
What I am most confused by all this is why me? I thought they figured me out last time I was teacher on duty. I even thought I would have an easier time then the other teachers because unlike them I actually interact and teach the vocational students. I was even going to let them watch tv in the evening if they had just left it alone. But they just had to keep pushing. This day will remind me why I never want to have children. I spent 5 hours dealing with young adults who act like spoiled children. Im exhausted! Now I have to go back up there and deal with dinner. So while everyone else got to relax and enjoy their holiday, I made my students must hate list. and you know what? I feel pretty damn good about it.
What I am most confused by all this is why me? I thought they figured me out last time I was teacher on duty. I even thought I would have an easier time then the other teachers because unlike them I actually interact and teach the vocational students. I was even going to let them watch tv in the evening if they had just left it alone. But they just had to keep pushing. This day will remind me why I never want to have children. I spent 5 hours dealing with young adults who act like spoiled children. Im exhausted! Now I have to go back up there and deal with dinner. So while everyone else got to relax and enjoy their holiday, I made my students must hate list. and you know what? I feel pretty damn good about it.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Purple Blossoms
I went to Nairobi this week to greet the new group of education trainees. I still cant believe its almost been a whole yr since I was in their shoes. As I watch my favorite purple blossoms fall off the trees, I am taken back to this time last year. Still packing with my mom the night before, saying goodbye to my family and friends at the airport, meeting the group of people I would come to rely upon, getting off the plane in Nairobi, feeling sick to my stomach, and asking myself about 1000 times what I have gotten myself in for. Sometimes, I feel like the year has just gone by so fast and yet I remember days when I felt it would never end. As the new trainees and “seasoned” volunteers( It still feels weird to say it) sit down for their first dinner in country, I am bombarded with questions. Some are the exact same questions I asked the volunteers who were there to greet us and I feel honored to be in this position, being the one who is the expert. I enjoyed seeing their faces as they went through the emotions of arriving in country. One of the "new" trainees isn't new at all but an extending PCV from the Caribbean. It was nice to be able to talk to him about what his second year was like, what the options are after you finish you service. It was entertaining to see the trainees asking us questions and the seasoned volunteers asking the extending volunteer/trainee questions. We spend the next day and night sharing stories and experiences, giving lessons on how to use the choo, what their host families will be like and words of encouragement and wisdom for what is to come next. For them, 2 months of rigorous training and the chance to be something bigger than themselves. For me….we shall see…maybe a extension in the Caribbean. This year has been filled with ups and downs. Personally I wish it would stop and give me a break but then that wouldnt be peace corps. I don’t know what is to come next for me or what this year will hold. All I can do is take it day by day, do my best and enjoy my final year in Kenya 
Oh the joys of adulthood!
So this week has been a shitty week. If you read my blog, you’ll knowI had some issues trying to take my kids to the local VCT and instead got the school to agree to bring the Deaf VCT here to the school. For the last month or so I have been on the internet, phone and talking people’s ear off trying to plan this event. When I first started, my school said money was not an issue. I knew we were still a special school with no extra money to splurge so I worked hard trying to cut every corner I could in terms of money. Last week I was told the school had no money…at all! I was devastated and called a contact at Peace Corps to help me figure out what to do. In the end he recommended to cancel it. I cried when I wrote the email to the contact at VCT canceling the event that my kids needed. Well, the week just kept getting better and better.
The weekend before, I had caught some kids missing church. I told my counterpart but another teacher overheard. Later on she asked for the names and I begged her to not beat them. She said we needed to make examples of the boys and will only beat one and she went so far as to tell me she would make me do it. She would make me stand there and beat the boys until I cried and ran away. I refused to give her the names and told her I would not stand for that. She accused me of "harboring criminals"..... they missed church! Not kill someone! Well the fun of my week did not end there.
I got into my first confrontation with a fellow teacher. Ok maybe not the first but the first one that needed the aide of the headmaster. It has left me emotionally drained and frustrated. Im glad I am going to Nairobi tomorrow. I need a break. Why must adults act like children? Now, I don’t mean the child at heart kind of thing but ignoring a problem and or person? To me it’s childish and I find it so frustrating. I asked many other people how to deal with her, with no help in return. This problem has been hanging around us filling the room with smoke for awhile now. Today was when we saw the fire. It was all smooth going back during my first term and then I guess I opened my eyes to who she really was. I have separated myself from her but I figured since shes still my colleague we could still be civil. For the last week or so, shes been ignoring me. I greet her, I ask her something, and she just looks the other way. I have asked her twice what I have done to deserve this…I get nothing. Now, if this was anyone else I would just say shes a b***h and go on with my business. However, I needed some papers that she kept for my class 8 and with her ignoring me, I was having a hard time acquiring them. I decided to use the American way since the Kenyan way was getting me no where. I was going to be calm, direct and try to keep my frustrations at bay and be polite. I thought the best way would be to do it in the staff room. I stupidly thought if other teachers were around, then it wouldn’t get out of hand. Boy was I wrong. She snapped at me which lead to me snapping at her. But I guess it all worked out in the end because the headmaster finally decided it was time to deal with it. We both sat and told our side of things. She got a high and mighty attitude with me and I could see this going nowhere. I decided if she still wants to act like a child, I could be the bigger person and show her how to act like an adult. So I apologized for any wrong doing I may have done to her, any miscommunication that may have happened with us and shook her hand. Did she follow my lead and apologize to me? She decided it was more fun to act like a child.
Later I heard the teachers talking about me. Everyone was siding with her. I put on a brave front but then went to my house and cried. I felt alone, pissed off, wanting to just call her a b***h and catch the next flight home. I was frustrated with myself with how I let her get to me and breaking one of my term 3 revolutions. Unfortunately, I couldn’t hide in my house all day, I still had a class to make work for before I left and since the teacher wouldn’t give me the papers I needed I had to find something else. I went back to school to use the copy machine. While in there another teacher came in. She was one of the few teachers I didn’t really talk to much. She’s normally quite and we teach different grades. She put her hand on my shoulder and told me she’s heard everything that’s happened and to not worry about the other teachers. She explained when it comes to me, some teachers turn stupid and to ignore them. I arrived alone and will go home alone. She apologized for not talking to me more but that she was there if I needed her. I felt better knowing I still had a few teachers on my side. So I broke a revolution. I let the teachers drama get to me. But I guess everyone is allowed a slip or two. I guess its time just to pick myself up, try to improve and continue on. Plus, if I leave now, who will show her the ropes to this whole adult thing.
The weekend before, I had caught some kids missing church. I told my counterpart but another teacher overheard. Later on she asked for the names and I begged her to not beat them. She said we needed to make examples of the boys and will only beat one and she went so far as to tell me she would make me do it. She would make me stand there and beat the boys until I cried and ran away. I refused to give her the names and told her I would not stand for that. She accused me of "harboring criminals"..... they missed church! Not kill someone! Well the fun of my week did not end there.
I got into my first confrontation with a fellow teacher. Ok maybe not the first but the first one that needed the aide of the headmaster. It has left me emotionally drained and frustrated. Im glad I am going to Nairobi tomorrow. I need a break. Why must adults act like children? Now, I don’t mean the child at heart kind of thing but ignoring a problem and or person? To me it’s childish and I find it so frustrating. I asked many other people how to deal with her, with no help in return. This problem has been hanging around us filling the room with smoke for awhile now. Today was when we saw the fire. It was all smooth going back during my first term and then I guess I opened my eyes to who she really was. I have separated myself from her but I figured since shes still my colleague we could still be civil. For the last week or so, shes been ignoring me. I greet her, I ask her something, and she just looks the other way. I have asked her twice what I have done to deserve this…I get nothing. Now, if this was anyone else I would just say shes a b***h and go on with my business. However, I needed some papers that she kept for my class 8 and with her ignoring me, I was having a hard time acquiring them. I decided to use the American way since the Kenyan way was getting me no where. I was going to be calm, direct and try to keep my frustrations at bay and be polite. I thought the best way would be to do it in the staff room. I stupidly thought if other teachers were around, then it wouldn’t get out of hand. Boy was I wrong. She snapped at me which lead to me snapping at her. But I guess it all worked out in the end because the headmaster finally decided it was time to deal with it. We both sat and told our side of things. She got a high and mighty attitude with me and I could see this going nowhere. I decided if she still wants to act like a child, I could be the bigger person and show her how to act like an adult. So I apologized for any wrong doing I may have done to her, any miscommunication that may have happened with us and shook her hand. Did she follow my lead and apologize to me? She decided it was more fun to act like a child.
Later I heard the teachers talking about me. Everyone was siding with her. I put on a brave front but then went to my house and cried. I felt alone, pissed off, wanting to just call her a b***h and catch the next flight home. I was frustrated with myself with how I let her get to me and breaking one of my term 3 revolutions. Unfortunately, I couldn’t hide in my house all day, I still had a class to make work for before I left and since the teacher wouldn’t give me the papers I needed I had to find something else. I went back to school to use the copy machine. While in there another teacher came in. She was one of the few teachers I didn’t really talk to much. She’s normally quite and we teach different grades. She put her hand on my shoulder and told me she’s heard everything that’s happened and to not worry about the other teachers. She explained when it comes to me, some teachers turn stupid and to ignore them. I arrived alone and will go home alone. She apologized for not talking to me more but that she was there if I needed her. I felt better knowing I still had a few teachers on my side. So I broke a revolution. I let the teachers drama get to me. But I guess everyone is allowed a slip or two. I guess its time just to pick myself up, try to improve and continue on. Plus, if I leave now, who will show her the ropes to this whole adult thing.
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